New Year’s Eve Party

No, I never was one to party on New Year’s Eve.

Not Anti-Social. I like people but not crowds. Perhaps this is an Advantage in the Time of Covid?

However, Bill and I remember many years of “partying” with good friends. And many years ago, in this rural area of Virginia where we settled for over 30 years, we made friends with a retired couple in Camelot. Except for 2020, we four had regular dinners together and rejoiced in differing opinions on most every topic. Mostly we loved sharing laughter.

And many years ago we created our own traditional New Year’s Eves together, following the same plan each year. We met around 6:00 PM, dined amid happy teasing conversation, and then returned to our place to watch a movie. And some of us were already yawning.

By 11:00 PM or sooner, we began checking up on Pete, who would begin snoring even if we had purchased a wildly exciting action film.

The snoring was Bill’s cue to gather glasses and champagne.

And the yearly agreement was this:

• If we cannot make it to midnight, we will have champagne and wish each other well and our friends can go home.
• If we do make it to midnight, then there will be something to tell the family about for the next year. “Guess what? We stayed awake until midnight!”
• We rarely make it to midnight on New Year’s Eve, but we always create fond memories.

In favor of self shut downs and thanks to the threat of the Nasty Virus Covid for most of 2020, we will miss our two laughing friends this New Year’s Eve. At any rate, we forgot to get the champagne. But, at the stroke of midnight I know Bill and I will drift back together from our different movies in different rooms to wish each other good health and good luck in the coming year. And we will call or be called by our beautiful family. And if it’s not too late before midnight we will call our old pals here in Camelot!

I wish you well too, and even without champagne.

“Happy New Year my friends out there in Cyberspace. And Here’s to making and maintaining great connections!”

Advertisement

Read Full Post »

Best Friends Forever

We met when we were children, both eleven years old with paper dolls, coloring books, and we played jacks on the kitchen floor.  We shared our dreams, spent whole nights giggling, traded clothes, and created lifelong memories of wild adventures.

Time slipped by almost accidentally and we grew up together – still best friends.

We are still growing up together – and still best friends.

Kit gave us nicknames way back when first we met.

She was Kit-the-Wit and I was Dort-the-Snort (Dort short for Dorothy).  When we are together we still use those names.  If we are shopping, Kit will call me to look at something.  “Hey Snort – look at this!”  Sometimes I wonder what people think.

To celebrate the arrival of 2020 I received a package from my Oldest Best Friend Forever.  And here was my reply:

Dear Wit,  I now have a collection of 3 Best Friend books from you.  Earlier you sent  “Kindred Spirits, Forever Wacky Friends”.  I have it behind glass in our breakfront.

But now I love the last one best – the one that came today called “I’m Lucky to Have a Friend Like You” and I love the pictures and comments you included in the front.  We both look so young and beautiful.  We didn’t even know how young and beautiful we really were did we?

Then there is the 3rd book…the birthday gift…the laughter when you’re at “Wit’s end.”  So clever and what a reminder about the role laughter played through all our years as friends.

There are only a few people who can unlock what I call my hysterical laughter.  You were first.  And now son Corky. It’s when I get this uncontrollable unstoppable laughter to the point of tears.

You have been a gift throughout my life Wit and more thoughtful than I can ever be.  

You are the friend I loved through childhood and through all the stages between then and now. 

And even now in our golden-olden years I am proud to call you my Best Friend Forever.  

Love, Snort

Read Full Post »

Happy Birthday BFF

Happy Birthday to Kit the Wit

This my oldest, first, and Best Friend Forever.

Her name is Kit and we met when we were eleven years old.

She gave us nicknames then,

and mine was not too flattering but has stuck all these years.

She is Kit the Wit.

And I am Dort the Snort.

I call her Wit and she calls me Snort to this day and she will yell out to me in a store or other public place, “Hey SNORT!  Come and look at this.”

I suppose people wonder about that, but I am so used to it I don’t notice.

We played paper dolls, jacks, rode bikes, stayed up all night giggling.

We went through the phases of our lives, first cars, first boyfriends, marriage, kids, aging.

And always laughter through it all.

We have stories to tell and memories to share about moon baths and sunburns and trying on her big sister’s clothes;  about first loves and grown up relationships and raising sons.

She is still always late and I am always early.  I am fussy neat and she is haphazard.  Some things never change.

But I still learn from my friend – the meaning of patience and finding humor in the bizarre.

The thing about Wit is her kindness and her eternal sense of humor.

I don’t know anyone else her age who has a big collection of singing stuffed animals and who joyfully winds them all up to sing (not in harmony either) at the same time.

How I wish I could have been with Wit this June 16th for her birthday!

How I wish we could “spend the night” again one more time –  talking and laughing, and laughing and laughing.

Once again, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY WIT!  You are still my BFF. ”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

The Doomsday Connection

Virginia Black Bear Cub – Photo Source Unknown

“If I expect the worst will happen and then it is the best, I am happily surprised. On the other hand, if I expect the best and the worst happens, I am sorry I didn’t think the worst to begin with.”    Quote by ~Dor

I have a blogger friend, Kate, who freely admits she magnifies simple human maladies into end-of-the-world death-approaching, devastating ailments. She makes me laugh because I see “me” in there too.

Once the question was asked at a book club meeting, “What kinds of books do you prefer?”

And there were answers like, “Mysteries, Romance, Biographies, Historical Fiction, etc.”

My answer was, “Doomsday  books.”

And everybody laughed!

Yes, it is true I love doomsday stories (fiction or non) about living through the plague, the great influenza, the civil war, the world wars, floods, hunger, and pestilence.

The first book I loved, cried over, sped through and read again and again was the American Classic,  Ethan Frome, by Edith Wharton.  And I still wish I could change the ending.  Surely the doomed lovers could have positively altered the course of their lives and survived unscathed. Couldn’t they?

Progressing from that frustration I began reading powerful historic treatises on The Great Influenza, Isaac’s Storm, and yes, those stories about the plague, war, starvation, pestilence, the plight of women, etc.  I still love them all and always looking for more.

And as a result, over time, I saved life-saving tips into a collection I now call Dor’s Doomsday Survival Manual.

But  when my real-life friends look at the manual they laugh and seem to consider it a comedy.

And now you have it – the deep dark underside I have struggled so long to keep hidden, and the reason I aim to publish funny blog posts.

But I wonder if you would laugh as you browse through Dor’s manual chapters.

• What to do if there is a bear on your deck!  Hide – plus other good ideas.
• How to save a cat from drowning in a flood.  Float out in a sealed bucket (I just saw that on t.v.
• How to purify water.  Clorox?  Yes, really.
• Hidden water sources in your home.  Toilets?  Yes, really.
• Non-perishables that will last 25 years of even hundreds of years.  Fruit cake and honey – really!
• What to pack in a survival suitcase.  Chocolate?  Wishful thinking but there is a longer list.
• How to prepare for the Avian Flu (or did it already come and go?)  I think the Bird Flu passed on by…. or has it?
• What to do when food sources are low. You can live many days without food. Who knew?
• Beware of summer storms.
• Evacuation tips
• Assembling a first aid kit.
•  Tools and supplies to have at the ready.
• A Family Disaster plan.
• And more.

Do you think I should publish my Survival Manual as a comedy or what?

Your input is entirely welcome, but I am thinking the worst.

 

 

Read Full Post »

Fun(ny) Friends

Some friends are fun,

and some are funny.

Meet our friend Pete,

a combination of both.

We had dinner with our friends, Pete and Phebe last week.  We see them often and look forward each time to hilarious conversations that leave us literally doubled over with laughter.

I am always concerned there will be nothing to say

since we have probably said it all by now.

But no story gets left untold and nothing escapes our howling laughter.  

Pete is wearing Phebe’s hat in this photo and you an see he is cracking himself up and the silliness is oddly catchy.

We are supposed to be among the distinguished elderly now, behaving with quiet maturity and an air of pride and elegance to make our families proud.

It may be fortunate that our families are not around to witness actual behavior!

We even make political arguments insanely funny (maybe because things are so insane in that realm anyway).

And what young folks would want to listen to those zany memories of  our younger selves?  We relive ridiculous moments with humongous chuckles.

Teasing the young wait staff at our local restaurants is part of the unplanned plan too. They may be secretly snickering at those old folks who are having such a great time, but I think they know we love them.

On this last visit to The Sheridan Livery Inn, in Lexington, Virginia, an old favorite restaurant, a familiar waitress greeted us with, “Oh No!  It’s those crazy people again!”  

I took that as a fabulous compliment and so did the others.  Besides, it started us off laughing and we laughed right through the meal.  Surely all that laughing is beneficial for digestion.

How lucky we are to have such people in our lives who are fun, funny and always funnier – they are the catalysts for life’s comic relief.  And just think of all the new memories we are creating to laugh about later.

Read Full Post »

She Walks Like a Duck on a Dog Leash

Not to dwell on the saga of my ailing foot but it has survived months in an Air Cam Boot, weeks of physical therapy, tests and more tests and about six different diagnoses.

Dwelling may not be such a bad idea at that.

Here is a photo of an obstacle course (duplicated for home use).  The real thing is at my “PT” place.  PT stands for Physical Therapy.  Have you noticed how people talk in initials now?

Cone Obstacle Course at Dor’s House

Anyway, the orange coned obstacle course is among other torturous devices at my PT place.  It is designed to build strength and agility in a foot that flaps.

My left foot now flaps when I walk. I can hear it.

And to confirm the lopsided flapping gait,

Bill said, “You walk like a duck!”

So much for grace and pride.  Now add a dog leash for optimal humiliation!

Back to Physical Therapy, my well-meaning therapist, Brenda, puts a belt around my waist and the belt is so long it has a tail.  Then she holds the tail in case I am inclined to teeter toward a crash landing.

The challenge is to high step over each cone without falling or knocking anything down.

• No swinging a foot outward and around instead of over.
• No leaning on Brenda.
• No hopping.
• And if you knock a cone (or Brenda) over, keep going.

As a beginner at this dog/duck walk I managed to knock down quite a few cones.  Then, just as practice made perfect, they put out taller versions!  Staggering over a new set of towering obstacles was like being a beginner again.

And I was just getting good at the taller versions when they announced, “YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN!  No more leash.”

ALONE?  Are you kidding?

Nevertheless, grimly poised for action, I aimed to prove versatility, flexibility, agility, strength, balance, and the powers of a gimpy woman to convert liabilities into assets.

AND I COULD NOT MOVE!

Terrified, to take the first step without a security dog/duck leash, I was frozen at the starting gate.

Finally, Brenda took pity and offered psychological support. She followed along as a human safety net.  And I completed the arduous leash-less journey with only two fallen cones!

Next visit I plan to shock everyone with a perfect solo performance (hence the home-based obstacle course for practice)!  But what diabolical activity will they come up with next?

Did I tell you they have me picking up marbles with my toes?

Read Full Post »

The Weight of a Hula Hoop

Ever hear of a weighted hula hoop?  This one has the addition of 3 pounds!  Each grandgirl tried it once and that was the end of hula hooping.

I never learned to hold up a “weight-less” version so they all had my adoring admiration.

Read Full Post »

Aging Prankster

Growing old can be fun.  At least that’s what my oldest friend, Kit, says.

Photographer Unknown

Read Full Post »

Is it Love the Morning After?

From http://www.quotesgram.com

I had an easy day yesterday.  No hard labor, sweating or dropping food on my shirt.  Everything I wore was still clean and crisp by bedtime.  So in an odd change of habit, I hung everything up to air overnight (except the used underwear of course) and decided to wear the same things today (with fresh under garments of course).

After dressing and when I was all set to go, I met up with Bill and said, “Good morning Bill!”

“You look nice,” he replied.

“It’s exactly the same thing I wore yesterday,” said I.

“Oh.”

There was not much to say after that, but there is nothing like Morning After Laughter in yesterday’s clothes.

Read Full Post »

A Sign of the Times

There is a sign I just can’t resist sharing.

Our guide translated it from German to English:

ABSOLUTELY NO PARKING OF BICYCLES HERE!!!!!   (VERBOTEN!!!!!)

And beneath the sign………….

 

 

Read Full Post »