Hospitals are for Others

Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

Hospitals are for other people.

Hospitals are o.k. if you are young and strong.

But now in a golden year and facing a hospital visit soon, I am grinning and bearing the notion that I am now one of those others.

Putting my right hip in for removal and replacement sounds easy peazy these days but the preparations and advance appointments are daunting, especially when a “post-op appointment” is scheduled for 3 days before the surgery.

Good thing my golden year left me with a golden eye that is able to catch errors!

Then there were two sets of lab work (in better words – “blood letting”.)

The first blood tests went well.

The second was conducted by a novice who, in an effort to collect seven vials, left my left arm a rainbow of black, blue, yellow and red bruises as evidence of cruel and unusual punishment.

My tests are clear though.

The Dentist says I am good to go.

The General Practitioner says so too. And after he proclaimed a clean bill of health he actually gave me a big hug and wished me luck. This had the dual effect of making me smile in the knowledge my doctor of over 20 years really cares and/or making me worry that he is secretly afraid he will never see me again.

Speaking of never seeing me again, I happened to be scanning Google stuff on surgeries and came across the little known fact that more people die in surgeries performed on Fridays! Wouldn’t you know it? I am scheduled on a Friday!

But, going on the premise that I will be the standout survivor of a Friday massacre,

I am practicing breathing into a gadget, doing simple exercises, trying to walk, and

the pre-op appointments that were scheduled correctly are now almost over.

Note: BigFoot is still affecting the Left extremity but sends regards. I keep mentioning to the orthopedic experts how BigFoot started over on the left ankle, swelled, moved around and is still capricious. But no one in the medical establishment pays a bit of attention. Evidently surgeons specialize in only one thing at a time and BigFoot will just have to wait.

Well the day is drawing near!

Please wish me luck my friends in the blog-us-fear.

There will surely be stories to tell when this is all over.

Advertisement

Read Full Post »

Is There an Aspirin in the House?

Yesterday  my friend spent the morning at one of our best-in-Virginia  hospitals.  She took her husband there for surgery.

While waiting for word of his condition, she developed a splitting headache and asked the nurse for an aspirin.

“Sorry, we can’t give out meds – even the over-the counter type,” the nurse replied.  “Check in the pharmacy though.”

The pharmacy (which no doubt only fills prescriptions because it is a hospital after all) is a far piece from the waiting room and my friend did not want to leave her spot.

The hospital gift shop is also a far trek when you are waiting for a loved one to emerge from surgery and there is no guarantee a gift shop would have over-the-counter pain meds anyway.

Obviously my friend wanted to be nearby to get the status of her husband’s recovery from surgery.

She grinned and bore it.

Ever hear the saying, “Water water everywhere and not a drop to drink?”

 

 

 

 

Read Full Post »

Beauty is Only Skin Deep

 

Peanuts Cartoon – From http://www.thecuriousbrain.com

I know.  I already told you about my swollen foot.

It is a case that should be included in the television show, Mystery Diagnosis.

But since a mildly swollen foot is admittedly a bit boring, don’t worry, it  is not really the subject of this blog post.

It goes deeper than that. “It goes down deep…layer after layer after layer!”

One of the tests they did was to check circulation via a sonogram.  Although I lay upon the table worrying, the technician went about her business and kept smiling.   And I thought, “How cruel to keep one in suspense and grin about it.”

But I liked her cheerful attitude and painful as it was to erase the worry lines from my forehead, I dutifully grinned back.

Technicians are usually secretive and unwilling to share information, but Leigh was different.

With a great big smile she said,

“You have BEAUTIFUL veins!”

Huh?  Really?

“In the business, that’s what we call them, and you have beautiful juicy veins.”

My friends, are you listening?  I HAVE BEAUTIFUL JUICY VEINS!

She went on to say there are many people who have skinny, narrow little veins with inhibited blood flow.

I was no longer really listening but was smiling smugly.

And all the way home I smiled smugly and laughed out loud too.

Now, in the looking glass I see the usual old-er, less than star quality image.  But I just have to remember this.

I have BEAUTIFUL veins!

And Mom was right again.

Beauty is only skin deep.

I  just wish I had a copy of that sonogram!

From Yahoo.com – a definition by Duude:

“Beauty is only skin deep” refers to the outward beauty of a person. Of course, we must realise that a person can be beautiful on the inside. Such a person is often referred to as a ‘lovely’ person. However, when we refer to something beautiful we are usually referring to that something’s outward appearance. What the phrase tries to emphasise is that the outward appearance of a person counts for nothing, but it is what lies beneath the skin, the actual person him/herself is what really matters. 

 

Read Full Post »

Foot and Mouth Disease

The Top of My Hospital

We are approaching the end of a week.

Thankfully.

This week has been just chock full of exciting things.

I have been visiting my local hospital so often it is beginning to feel downright homey.

View from My Hospital’s Parking Lot

I am also feeling popular, kindly and easily approachable..

Every time I go in for a test I meet some old fella (well maybe about my age) who immediately starts talking and tells me his whole life story including all current anatomical deficiencies.  It is more than I wish to know of course but I lend a sympathetic ear and nod and ooh and ahh in the right places.

I know you would like to hear why I have been visiting the hospital so often.  And since the hospital buddies/admirers never ask about MY reasons for being there, you are the unfortunate recipients of this sad tale of woe.

It all started with a swollen foot.  I think I told you about that about two weeks ago.

It ended with a tooth extraction.

And the swollen foot is still swollen.

I am finding it difficult to sort this all out too.  But here is an attempt.

I did go to my primary doctor about the foot.

“Should I baby it Doctor?”  “Or should I walk through it and exercise it away?”

“I won’t know that until I know what caused it,” said he.

And he promptly scheduled:

• A blood test to rule out gout.   Nope, no gout.
• An Echocardiogram to rule out heart.  Nope, heart’s just fine.
• A sonogram to rule out a clot. Nope, no clot.
• An X-ray to rule out a break or fracture.  Nope, no breaks or fractures.

None of these appointments could be scheduled on the same day – hence, the multiple hospital visits and the ever growing number of male acquaintances and their autobiographies.

About this time a back molar tooth (mine) became sensitive to pressure!

Then it began to really hurt non-stop.

That meant a trip to the dentist who said it was a bad tooth and had to come out ASAP.  He referred me to a tooth pulling specialist with a fancy name like Oral Maxillofacial Surgery.

And so yesterday I had an extraction there.  That means they yanked the offensive tooth right out!

I will not beleaguer you with details about that horror-fying experience, but the extractor person accomplished the deed  in 30 minutes.  Fortunately, Bill went along for the ride and was there to catch me as I staggered out.  He was my life-saver-hero who literally let me cry on his shoulder! That was yesterday and when the shakes wore off there was no pain and no pain since.

Note:  Next time I will request total anesthesia, gas, PUT ME OUT COLD PLEASE!

That brings me back to the swollen foot which is still swollen!

Now the doctor is talking about a possible MRI for the foot – not the tooth.

And while I wait, Bill purchased a glamorous set of hotpink and black lace-up, sturdy, walking shoes for me.  Ahh, I know it’s not a fur coat or diamonds, but I am hero worshipping anyway.

Bill Got Me Some New Shoes!

 

 

Read Full Post »