It might be a funny story for future generation giggles.
It was not funny yesterday.
I decided to make hard boiled eggs.
I decided to try another way to make them.
- Step 1:
You bring them to a boil and
- Step 2:
Immediately remove them from the heat and allow to stand precisely 17 minutes.
Yup. I did Step 1. I am good at following directions.
And then I left.
I think I thought I had 17 minutes to write thank you notes.
The bad thing is I missed Step 2 – the 17 minute-part where you take the eggs off the stove and allow them to stand.
It must have been about 37 minutes later when I heard a funny noise. Elsa-the-dog was pacing and trying to tell me something was amiss, but I ignored her and told her everything would be allright.
I was busy concentrating you know – writing lovely thank you notes. It couldn’t be 17 minutes already. Could it?
Then there came another noise.
Only this time it was a thunderous BANG! Like a very loud GUNSHOT in the kitchen!
Was someone being murdered INSIDE my house?
It is still gun hunting season here.
Was there someone actually firing a gun in my house?
I ran/hobbled to the kitchen in time to see – YES – it was an explosion all right –
AN EXPLOSION OF EGGS!
Have you ever seen an egg explode?
It was a first for me too.
Oddly enough, I become very calm and deliberate in a crisis. If you discount the way I talk to myself and even give myself vocal instructions, you would surely admire my bravery in quickly turning the burner off. I also thought to put Elsa in the back room to keep her from eating exploded eggs.
Note: There were no more eggs in the pot. I think most of them were on the ceiling and the pot was burned black.
There was definitely egg on the ceiling,
egg on the floor,
egg across the stove top,
egg under the vent hood,
eggs on the walls,
bits of egg into the next room,
egg EVERYWHERE!
Bill helped me clean up, especially in the upper reaches (like egg on top of the refrigerator).
I am still finding egg or egg shells in unusual places.
Finally my friend Amy came over and under her eagle eye and a tightrope walker’s balance, the last remnants of eggs on the ceiling are gone.
The only thing left is
“egg on my face.”
If you are not familiar with this expression, here is what it means.
From “The Dictionary of Cliches” by James Rogers (Ballatine Books, New York, 1985): “to have egg on your face – To be embarrassed or chagrined at something one has done or the way one did it; to do something ineptly. The expression originated in the United States some 25 years ago, probably from the fact that someone eating an egg sloppily is likely to wind up with some of it on his face and therefore not looking his best.
OH My
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Oh dear. I can easily get distracted but fortunately my stove has a very annoying timer. I only let the eggs sit in the hot water for 12 minutes. By that time the water is probably cool enough that it doesn’t matter but YOU HAVE TO TURN THE HEAT OFF or bad things happen! I have a friend who didn’t know you have to slit chestnuts before roasting in a fireplace. That is a huge mess to clean up too.
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Oh, dear, what a mess that must have been. Funny only in retrospective, I imagine!
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I’ve seen this happen in a microwave, but never in a pan. Yowza!
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Hi Dor! I’m so sorry this happened to you! Funny but NOT! xoxoxo
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Happy New Year Dor! BTW, do you know how to do a soft boiled egg?
(Cover egg in cold water and bring to boil; remove after 3 min. and turn off stove. Remove shell or crack shell right away to get out cooked egg or it will cook some more.) Cheers!
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Sorry, Dor! I can’t imagine the explosion and horrible mess in your kitchen! I never heard of eggs exploding in a pot, but years ago there was a large explosion in a store where the demonstrator of a microwave oven attempted to cook a hard boiled egg in its shell. I’ll always remember that, like you will forever remember your hard boiled eggs story!!!
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Great story! 🙄
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Ha,ha! This reminds me of when my mother’s pressure cooker “blew up”. We had potatoes all over the kitchen and we ended up having to wash the ceiling and all the walls – ugh! I am so sorry, Dorothy. What a way to end 2018. Now we can truly say 2019 has got to be better! 😘 Julie
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Oops. Maybe go back to the old way of boiling eggs.
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Awww! Poor you! Those eggs should have been more patient.
You may have just given me the courage to try steaming eggs. I’ve read that you can steam them in a rice cooker or hot pot. I am afraid that it won’t work, and when I cool the first one and break it, it will still be runny. Surely that would be easier than scraping egg off every surface in the kitchen!
My worst kitchen disaster was dropping a huge pot of spaghetti sauce. It went all over the stove, leaked into the oven, streaked the back door, and oozed all over the floor. It looked like somebody died, but I lived to tell the tale.
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I haven’t tried chestnuts yet. May wait until I conquer eggs. 🙂
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Actually it was funny while we were cleaning up. And it just got funnier and funnier. 🙂
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Good luck with that steaming Anne! Me, I am wary of eggs now even though I am thinking of an omelet for breakfast. Happy New Year!
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Good idea! 🙂 There is something to be said for old but tried and true. 🙂
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I figure things can only go up in 2019 Julie! Tomorrow I intend to devour all the cookies and junk around (stocking up for starvation in the New Year). But let’s have lunch anyway. Happy New Year to you and Teddy. 🙂
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The Exploding Eggs is a never forget horror story that is cause for laughter already. Life is full of odd surprises.
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Thanks for the recipe. I used to love soft boiled eggs but forgot how to make them. This will help if they don’t explode. 🙂
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Thanks Emmy! It does make a good story and seems to be cause for laughter. Even Bill and I were laughing as we cleaned up.
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I have never seen it either way so it was quite a shock but makes for a funny story now. Happy New Year and thanks for visiting my blog. 🙂
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Oops!! And there you were being “eggstra” kind to write thank you notes! I learned that you can hard boil eggs in those newfangled air fryer appliances. Well, I tried that but obviously left them in it way too long. They didn’t explode fortunately, but oh my, did they smell horrible!!!
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I won’t egg you on. Happy New Year!
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Haven’t you ever heard the saying “Never put all your eggs in one vent hood?” Happy New Year, Dor.
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I am so glad you have had problems with eggs too. I never even knew how to boil them when we were married. Can’t say I have progressed much.
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HoHoHo! Happy New Year to you too! 🙂
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oh dear. We really are very alike. Not exploding eggs, but stewed apples stuck to the pot and yes after days of trying to clean it, the pot now holds plants in the garden. Happy New Year to you, Bill and your famiky.
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How funny (as long as it ended well without burning the house down)! 🙂
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You wrote that egg story just to make me feel better about the kitchen disasters I’ve caused, right? So good of you; thanks for a kind post, Dor.
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At least you and Bill were able to laugh! I try not to leave the kitchen while I am cooking or at least have a timer on to remind me. I am easily distracted!
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Hahahaha! I thought I was the only one creating kitchen disasters! Now you are making me feel better too.
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I am now staying in the kitchen no matter what is cooking! And having the timer on is a great idea too. Thanks coastalcrone.
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Oh no!! what a mess.
Here’s my easy peasy method to perfect, easy-to-peel boiled eggs:
1) fill saucepan 2/3 full with water and bring water to a rolling boil
2) with a tablespoon, gently place each egg, 1 at a time, into the boiling water. As many as you want, I typically cook 8 at a time, eat 2 daily
3) stir in 1 tsp of baking soda into the boiling water
4) set timer for 12 minutes
5) at 10 minutes, fill a large Gladware/tupperware container with ice then water.
6) when timer goes off, drain out boiling water into the sink, and tumble boiled eggs into the ice “bath”
7) let stand in ice bath (in sink is easiest) till all the ice is melted and the eggs are cooled.
8) pour of water and pop into the fridge – I peel as I need them, easy peasy!
🙂 MJ
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Thank you Emjay! I was delighted to get your recipe and I have already made 5 eggs. Will taste one tomorrow. I know it is ridiculous to live to this venerable age and not really know how to boil an egg. My mother was a terrible cook so I learned from the best. 🙂 Thank you again my friend.
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Not ridiculous at all – we learn as we know — I’m fortunate Mom could cook and cooked with me ~ she had lots of little tips that made things easier … let me know how they turned out. Another tip, peel in sink under cold running water. The shells should just slide off 🙂 MJ
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They came out perfect! And I had one this morning that tasted perfect! Thanks Emjay and for the last tip too. 🙂 You have made your mark on my life.
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aww! thank you, so glad they all worked out 🙂 I knew they would. Now you’re good to go. Your post reminded me of how much my Mom taught me and that not everyone enjoys that advantage. I am mindful to teach my grand-kids, standing side-by-side with them, They love it and are growing into good little cooks themselves!! 🙂 MJ
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