I am an independent woman. I open my own doors, pull out my own chairs, put on my own coat, and find my own way. I always have. Even so, there occasionally enters a man who embodies the age of chivalry. This knight in shining armor is a real live apparition as he insists on implementing the archaic practice of treating a lady – well – like a lady.
Not the Right Knight
But to punctuate this story, I must tell you my own dearly beloved spouse is not “the knight” in question. Bill grew up in the Bronx, New York, where he and the neighborhood kids passed time listening to Mr. Tate stagger up the stairs drunk , only to be pushed back down by Mrs. Tate with shouts of derision. Life was on the rough side. And though I wasn’t treated exactly like a princess, I fell in love with a boy who seemed to emerge from the silver screen in the film, West Side Story. I long ago forgave him for not opening doors or pulling out chairs and our love has prevailed all these many years anyway. After all, there is more to life and love than chivalry.
Lately however, I am slower getting out of restaurant booths and notice that Bill is long gone and I’m still only halfway out of the booth. “I could be lying flat on my face back here,” I think. “Where the &%$##@ is he? When will he notice I am not behind him? Am I invisible or what?” This happens on a regular basis so I wonder about the age of chivalry.
And I would be lying if I told you I don’t enjoy medieval knightly behavior in men.
Enter Prince Pete
We dine out regularly with longtime friends (Pete and Phebe) who bring laughter to our lives. Pete is the epitome of a southern gentleman and in fact, has earned the title of “Prince.” I call him Prince Pete because he is courteous and kind to all the women who cross his path. He is leftover from another era and a product of prep school training who unfailingly acts with gallantry – especially toward women.
Prince Pete ALWAYS opens my car door to let me in and/or out. In fact, I sometimes feel embarrassed about not opening my own door for heaven’s sake! How helpless can you get? Still, I secretly love it and have become so accustomed to the service that now I wait for the door to open.
I am addicted to chivalry. But, please do not think I compare Prince Pete’s charming behavior to my errant knight, Bill (ahem).
The Pedestal Wobbles
Tonight Prince Pete drove to our favorite restaurant and parked. Knowing how gallant he is, I waited patiently in the back seat for him to open my door. It got fairly quiet. I heard voices outside though. And there I sat. I reached up for the hand grip for when the door should open but the door did not open.
What?
Where is Prince Pete?
Am I invisible in here?
Have they gone into the restaurant without me?
And finally I heard a voice inquire, “Where’s Dorothy?”
And would you believe that yes, Prince Pete FORGOT ME IN THE BACK SEAT! Never mind that Bill must have forgotten me too! Remember, Bill is my husband? And there I sat. Eventually I was retrieved with abject apologies which did little to lighten my loss of ego!
Alas, I fear I am becoming more and more invisible with age and though this incident resulted in ridiculously hilarious laughter (mine and theirs) I hope I at least have your sympathy out there.
Definition of Chivalry:
Gallantry, courtesy and honor. The medieval knightly system with a combination of qualities, namely honor, courtesy, justice and a readiness to help the weak. Courteous behavior, especially that of a man towards women.
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- Is there a place for chivalry in our society? (thepeliblog.wordpress.com)
I love southern gallantry! I’m afraid it has become a lost art.
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Well, all I can say is that you are certainly not invisible to me, and even though I’m not a gallant knight, I would never leave you behind!! 🙂
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2 comments: Bill just needs to be shoved down the stairs a couple of times probably.
And when they discovered you were missing, you should have just pretended to be asleep. A bit of drool would have helped. Then you would have gotten the sympathy vote. 🙂
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Ditto! 🙂
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You can sure tell who your friends are when it comes to times like this! 🙂 I would never leave you behind either.
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Blaahahahaha! I love the sleeping/drooling plan and may implement it the next time I’m left behind in a booth or in a car. Shoving Bill down the stairs is not an option however. Our staircase is a narrow, spiral, metal thing that would break the fall. 🙂
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🙂
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Our neighbor across the street is the same way. When he drives us to dinner, I am always pulled out of the car (gently of course) in front of the restaurant. My husband is also considerate but usually only when it’s raining. It’s nice to be a princess!
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I pride myself on being independent but Husband does open doors for me and Grandson has taken his example and opens doors for me. At this age it is great to have a helping hand to get out of the car! Being a gentleman never goes out of vogue!
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I love it that we both have gentlemanly neighbors! 🙂
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Coastalcrone – Thanks for visiting! Your husband’s “do as I do” example is obviously the key! How fortunate you are. 🙂
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I know what you mean, only your brother is also a “Prince” and gets after me for my independence. Hope he never stops.
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He became a “prince” on his own… no help from parental examples that I know of. 🙂
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I have to agree with apronheadlilly, maybe you should have played the “I’m asleep” card. 😉 I also agree that I like a little bit of chivalry too and I don’t get that much from my ‘prince’ either. But don’t despair, those good Southern gentlemen are still being taught this. When oldest daughter lived in the Deep South and we visited, the young men astounded me with their gracious gallantry. When I commented on it to one young fella, he answered, “Well, ma’am, our mamas know how to raise us right!” 🙂
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Glad to hear chivalry may still be alive in the deep south anyway! 🙂
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